Situationship - an undeniable aspect of the modern world.

 

A Situationship refers to a romantic relationship that lacks definition and commitment. Individuals involved in a Situationship are more than friends but less than fully committed partners. It is a unique and complex relationship dynamic where two people engage in emotional and physical intimacy without clearly defining their connection.

 In today's modern world, another term often used to describe a Situationship is a live-in relationship. In this type of arrangement, two individuals choose to cohabit and mimic the actions and responsibilities of a married couple, without any formal commitment or obligation. It can be seen as an open and undefined relationship, allowing either party to opt out at any time.

 However, the youth of modern India are increasingly embracing Situationships, often influenced by Western culture, without fully realizing that as emotional individuals, we Indians tend to seek commitment and loyalty once we enter into a relationship. It becomes challenging for us to remain detached while being in a relationship simultaneously. Unfortunately, this has led to alarming incidents of suicide and murder due to issues arising from Situationships. Even in cases where there is no extreme outcome, Situationships often hang delicately, and any attempt to seek more commitment can frighten a partner who avoids commitment, resulting in the connection disappearing abruptly.

Remaining silent in a Situationship is equally problematic, as it often leads to heartache. This situation can escalate into depression and loneliness, which can be difficult to overcome without external support. When two individuals enter into a relationship, they typically seek a romantic connection that gradually matures into a committed marriage, involving elements such as commitment, respect, loyalty, and trust. In our culture and society, the institution of marriage is highly valued, and it is expected that two individuals will stay together in a committed and well-defined relationship.

Situationships arise when the emotional investment of the two individuals involved is imbalanced. One person may be fully invested, while the other remains casual and non-committal. This mismatch in attachment levels can be hazardous in the long run. One cannot enter a relationship with the constant fear that their partner may suddenly opt out or leave.

Therefore, it is important to establish clear rules in a Situationship:

1. Honesty is crucial: From the very beginning, both individuals should express their expectations and intentions in the relationship. No one should be kept in the dark or taken for granted.

2. Value each other's time: Regardless of the casual nature of the relationship, it is essential to respect and value each other's time. Both parties deserve this basic level of consideration.

3. Prioritize emotional and physical needs: It is important to prioritize and address the emotional and physical needs of both individuals involved.

 Situationships can be complicated, but with open and honest communication from the start and ongoing discussions, they can become a healthy and beneficial way to fulfill intimate needs. After all, everyone deserves to be cared for in their relationships, even if they are casual in nature.

NOTE- It is important to note that the writer of this blog does not endorse Situationships but has written this article as a subject of discussion. Readers should approach this blog purely for entertainment purposes.                               

LIVE-IN : is India ready for it yet??

 As the Shraddha murder case came into the media limelight and shocked the nation due to the ghastly modus operandi of her live-in partner Aftab (He reportedly strangulated her, cut her body into multiple pieces, charred her face to hide her identity, and disposed them off over 18 days at various parts of Delhi NCR), the pertinent question raises its monstrous head yet again as to whether India is ready to embrace a set up like Live-in yet??  

This may not be the standalone case in our country where live-in couples are involved but the sheer hideous nature of the killing caught everybody's attention.    

Now according to Google, the definition of a LIVE-IN RELATIONSHIP is a mutual arrangement where two people involved in a romantic and sexual relationship as partners for a long term or permanently, decide to live together without marriage. A live-in relationship is also called "cohabitation" in some countries. In India, a live-in relationship has been given legal status too. The Apex Court even stated that a woman and a man living together is a choice and lies under the right to life.

Having said that I strongly believe that the young generation of our country who is aping the west blindly and getting into this setup of live-in has not understood the real meaning of being in a live-in relationship.  For them being in a live-in relationship is an escape from boundation and responsibilities that marriage brings with it. They want to have the cake and eat it too sans the confinement, restrictions, or legal implications.

To an extent that is fine but the problem arises when either of the partners starts behaving as if he/she owns the other person and starts controlling and dictating terms like whom to meet, where to go and when to return. I am not saying this does not happen in marriage but a live-in relationship is designed in such a way that both partners are free to decide their journey of life, living together under one roof. There is no constraint of any sort and both partners are independent to pursue their dreams, desires, and ambitions. The other partner can provide moral and emotional support if needed.

In this case, also Shraddha and Aftab were in a live-in relationship for good three years. Three years time is a good duration to understand the compatibility between both partners. Shraddha, who was not on talking terms with her parents (they didn't approve of their relationship right from the start) reportedly confided with her mother and one of her male friends that Aftab used to beat her up. 

Now a live-in relationship is a good setup to check mutual compatibility. Its a sort of prototype of marriage, to check the mutual bonding over a period of time, to check how well the two partners share the day-to-day responsibilities without any social or family pressures and if things are not going smoothly then any one of the two can move out of the setup without the stamp of a - Divorcee.      

It's a wonderful setup but the problem arises when despite being beaten up and being micromanaged live-in partner's like Shraddha continue to stay in the setup and eventually pay a heavy price.

Shraddha should have seen the writing on the wall considering she was a mature adult of 26 yrs and should have moved out way before. There was no compulsion, no family or social pressure to stay in such toxic relationship. The only reason I can see here might be blind love or dependency.  

Aftab reportedly too said in his confession that he had planned to kill her live-in partner long before the actual murder as things were not the same between the two of them as they were during the initial days. They used to fight a lot and he didn't like Shraddha talking or chatting with other male friends of hers. A day before the actual murder, Shraddha left the house after a fight with Aftab and stayed overnight at a male friend of hers which further infuriated Aftab who eventually took the ultimate step of killing her brutally.

Now Aftab too should have thought over it as to where the relationship is going and should have parted ways with Shraddha unless he had some vested interest in having an eye on her money considering he had her net banking details with him with which he transferred a good sum of money into his account after killing her.

Shraddha's murder case is yet to be solved and in days to come, we shall see a lot of truth uncovered by the police related to what led to this heinous crime. But this case is also an eye-opener for everyone which makes us realize that following the west blindly can have disastrous results. 

Before getting into the live-in relationship, the two partners in question need to incline themselves mentally as to why they are getting  into such a setup and what they both are seeking together and individually from this set up. After all to embrace something different to our culture we Indians should start thinking from our head rather than our heart if not completely then at least a bit.

Hope you resonate with my thoughts on this topic on which I was thinking of writing a blog since this dreaded news broke into the media. Looking forward to your comments and views on the said topic.

So until next time!

HAPPY READING!!

            

         

MY VISIT TO INDIA'S CLEANEST CITY...INDORE

The travel bug stung hard once again and the bags were packed as we were all set to embark on a journey to a place that boasts of being the cleanest city in the country - INDORE (Madhya Pradesh). After all, which better place to kick-start our travel journey for the year 2022 than this... starting on a clean slate in literal terms!!

For the studious kind, Indore is the only city in India which is having both an IIT and an IIM.

The city understandably holds this label with utmost pride and winning the coveted award has become a habit for the people of Indore as it has won the prestigious award not ONCE but FIVE TIMES CONSECUTIVELY under the "Swachhta Survekshan." Hearing and reading about it was one thing and witnessing it by our own eyes was an entirely different experience which I will share in my blog ahead.

So we reached Indore at 10 A.M. by overnight train from Delhi. Right from the time we got down at the railway station to the time we reached our hotel, we could see why the city tops the country's cleanest cities charts year after year. 

There was not even a single pile of garbage outside any shop and the roads were spik and span throughout. The walls were covered with beautiful murals and paintings which were giving a unique aesthetic feel to the overall surroundings. Must say, smart work from the authorities and of course the residents.

On further inquiry from the taxi driver, we came to know that the Indorians are in no mood of letting go of the title and the city is all set to win the award the sixth time. He said the citizens themselves are quite proactive and make sure they pick up whatever waste they see lying on the roads and dump it in the nearby dustbins as they move around and even request others who litter to use dustbins as when required. Don't they say in Hindi "Jeet ek nasha hai"...this is one such example. 

Moving on...we reached our pre-booked hotel- 'Playotel Premier' in Vijay Nagar slightly away (about 6 km) from the hustle and bustle of the city. Adjacent to Bombay Hospital, which is a landmark, The hotel is a superb property with warmly decorated rooms featuring a buffet restaurant and a game room. I strongly recommend it to whomsoever is traveling to this place. Our stay was relaxed, the food sumptuous and hospitality impeccable.

By this time we were hungry like hell so we quickly freshened up and were all set to move out for the fun as our taxi arrived. The taxi driver which dropped us at the hotel earlier offered to take us around during our stay in the city for the next three days which we happily agreed.

Our first stop was Indore's oldest eating place called "Chappan" at new Palasia. Now as the name suggests, it is an eating hole with 56 shops in a queue right after the other which offers a variety of street food in one place at a very nominal price. It is Food Lovers paradise and a must-visit place for all street foodies and my kids just loved the place as they ran around trying out one dish after the other. It was the best place to satiate our hunger as we were dying to taste the local delicacies. The place has been done up since the time I visited last about two decades ago. There is a lot of greenery around now with benches to sit and enjoy the food with friends and family. Earlier one could drive a vehicle right up to the shops but now as part of the Smart City project, the  area has been developed as a smart food street and is devoid of any vehicular movement. Undoubtedly the market offers a much more relaxed experience now. 

The market is up and running from 6 A.M . and serves mouthwatering local delicacies like Indori Poha and Jalebi, Garadu (a vegetable like sweet potato which is fried and served as crispy yam chaat), Bhutta Khees (grated corn cooked with milk, coconut, and spices served hot with masala, garnished with fresh coriander and lemon juice), Khopra Pattis (crispy, crunchy potato patties stuffed with a perfectly balanced sweet and savory coconut mixture served with chutney), Gulab Jamun, Hotdog, Indori Shikanji (made with milk, cream, and dry fruits) and much more till late in the evening. 

 

We were told evenings are more colourful as people flock here with friends and families to enjoy and the overall atmosphere is quite a unique experience.

Our stomachs were full and we were all set for our first local destination which was - Rajwada.  It is a historical palace built by the Holkars of the Maratha Empire about 200 years ago. This majestic seven-storied structure is a witness to the bygone splendour of the Holkar rulers of the Maratha Empire. It was burnt three times in its history; today only the front facade remains. Recent renovations have recreated some of the old glory of this beautiful palace. The front is still under renovation and the visitors can enter from a side entry. 

One of the most unique and fun facts about the palace is that the Southern front of the structure showcases its Maratha influence while the Eastern front showcases the European influence.

As we entered the palace we were greeted by a courtyard surrounded by a covered verandah with wooden pillars all along. It gave a very south Indian feel to me. As the renovation is still going on most of the palace was closed. We could see a temple on the ground floor and a museum on the first floor which houses the details of the Maratha empire and the story of Ahilyabai depicted in the form of numerous miniature dolls. Apart from it multiple war weapons, Palkis, and huge utensils of that era are on display in the museum. Overall a well- maintained place and a must-visit for sure.  

  

Just outside the front entrance which is being renovated is the statue of Ahilyabai Holkar in the middle of a small round park. Just behind the palace is the much-talked-about "Sarafa Bazar" situated, but more about it when we visit the place in my blog. Thoda to suspense rehna chahiye...    

Next up was "Bade Ganpatiji Temple". This temple houses perhaps the largest Ganesh idol in the world measuring 25 feet from crown to foot. Created as a result of the dream of an Avantika (Ujjain) resident, Shri Dadhich, it was built in 1875. This temple is famous for its big bright coloured statue of Lord Ganesha. The statue is said to be made of a mixture of limestone, jaggery, bricks, and sacred soil and water from the major pilgrim. 

After bowing our heads to the majestic Ganesha our next stop was  "Kanch Mandir". This is a unique Jain temple, a must to add to your Indore sightseeing list. Though not a huge temple, its beauty lies in the fact that the entire temple is made of Belgian stained glass and mirrors – from the floor to the ceilings, stairs, and walls, everything is crafted out of gleaming glass pieces, giving it an aura of opulence.

The dazzling domed ceiling displays intricate designs crafted from glass pieces. Its grandeur is enhanced manifold when it is lit up with lights and candles on certain Jain festivals like Mahavir Jayanti. This Jain temple is an architectural marvel in glass. Atop is a special glass chamber that multiplies the three statues of Lord Shantinath, Aadinath and Mahavira installed there into an indefinite number (said to be visible up to 24 times, corresponding to the 24 Tirthankaras). 

Next on the list was the iconic "Lal Bagh Palace". This majestic royal residence spread over a sprawling 28 acres is one of the best places to visit in Indore. At one time it had the reputation of having one of the best rose gardens in the country. Now converted to a museum displaying extraordinary exhibits from the glorious era, the Lal Bagh Palace should feature on your Indore travel itinerary.  

It allows you to glimpse through the rich heritage of this historic city and gives you a taste of the lavish lifestyle of the Holkar rulers. This palace is hugely influenced by the European style of architecture and be prepared to be bowled over by grand Italian columns, gorgeous chandeliers, rich Persian carpets, and exquisite stained glass windows. A noteworthy feature is the use of elevators in those times to deliver food to the dining halls. Unfortunately, Cameras and Mobile phones are not allowed inside so we could not click pictures.

As we were exiting the Lal Bagh Palace our Taxi driver suggested taking us to a place nearby which hardly gets mentioned 'in-the-places-to-visit-in-Indore-list' but worth a visit. We were exhausted by now and were hungry too but eventually gave in to the driver's innocent suggestion. 

We were taken to a residential colony and after maneuvering through several bylanes we reached to - guess where "Vaishno Mata Dham." 

Yes...amid numerous residential houses was a splendid Mata Vaishno Devi temple in all its glory!! We got out of the taxi and stood there in disbelief for a moment. After thanking our taxi driver for bringing us here we quickly entered the temple. 

As we moved in, we were directed into a serpentine cave just like in the original temple. The spiritual chanting of Bhajans, Shlokas amid the sound of wind and water flowing through the cave made the overall atmosphere magnificent and gives real peace of mind. There are numerous turns inside the cave where one has to crawl, stoop and walk carefully. In the mid, Ardh kunwari cave is also present. Stories tell that a sardarji in his dream saw maa Vaishno Devi on the land where this replica of a real temple is built. There is a Shiv Dham midway while climbing and then you reach the top where the sanctum of Mata Vaishno is situated. Unlike in the original Temple, you can sit here and admire the pindis for as long as you want. On the way down, there's a Sai Baba Dham as well. We came out of the temple all mesmerized and full of gratitude.      

By this time we were feeling the hunger pangs real hard so we decided to have lunch at a nearby restaurant which was also suggested by our taxi driver. The food was okay-ish and after filling ourselves up again we moved towards "Sitlamata market". This market is a great hub for all kinds of ethnic wear and there are a numerous stores selling exquisite sarees and lehengas. The quality of fabric here is also much better and yet they are quite reasonably priced. You will find sarees of exquisite zari work or chikankari designs. We were predecided for what we were looking for. Wiffy bought a couple of famous Maheshwari Saree and suits as I absorbed the ambiance of the market.

After the shopping spree, we called it a day and directed our taxi driver to drop us at the hotel.

Day 2 began with an early breakfast at the hotel restaurant as we had planned for visiting Mahakaleshwar Jyotirlinga at Ujjain which is about 55 km from Indore and takes 1.5 hrs by road. Our taxi driver reached our hotel on time and we pushed off.  During our ride as I researched about Ujaain more, I came to know that Ujjain is considered the Greenwich of India since the first meridian of longitude passes through it.

Mahakaleshwar Jyotirlinga is a temple dedicated to Lord Shiva and is one of the twelve Jyotirlingams shrines which are said to be the most sacred abodes of Shiva. The idol of Omkareshwar Mahadev is consecrated in the sanctum above the Mahakal shrine. The images of Ganesh, Parvati, and Karttikeya are installed in the west, north, and east of the sanctum sanctorum. To the south is the image of Nandi, the vehicle of Shiva. The idol of Nagchandreshwar on the third floor is open for darshan only on the day of Nag Panchami. The temple has five levels, one of which is underground. The temple itself is located in a spacious courtyard surrounded by massive walls near a lake. It is believed that prasada (holy offering) offered here to the deity can be re-offered, unlike all other shrines. 

After witnessing Lord Shiva in all its glory we moved towards nearby Ram ghat on the bank of Shipra River where Kumbh Mela is organized every 12 years. Ram ghat is the oldest bathing ghat in Ujjain. There are hundreds of Hindu shrines along the banks of the river Shipra which gives the ghat a very colourful ambiance. 

Next up was Kal Bhairava temple. It is believed to have been built by King Bhadrasen, on the banks of river Shipra. The village of Bhairogarh, famous for its printing, takes its name from the temple and is located very near. As we reached the temple we witnessed a huge crowd in serpentine queues outside the temple. We braced ourselves and took our place in one of the rows leading to the temple. Eventually, after an hour we managed to have darshan.

Then after having lunch our taxi moved back in the direction of Indore. The driver dropped us at the hotel at 5 in the evening.

After relaxing for a few hours we were up again to satiate our gastronomical fantasies. This time our destination was a place where Indore comes alive at night - the night street food market at Sarafa Bazar behind the Rajwada Palace. This market comes alive after 8 P.M. when the jewellery market closes down and runs till late into the night. This market is by far the most celebrated fooding landmark of Indore city. If you are a food lover this is the place to be.

Though no one is sure about the origin of this bazaar, it is believed that it started some 100 years ago and was encouraged by jewellery shop owners so the noise and bustle would secure their shops at night. With this in mind, they willingly started offering space in front of their shops to food vendors and, thus, Sarafa Bazar came into existence. Today, when most of Indore is asleep, this late-night market gets nearly 3000 visitors, both locals, and tourists. About 50 different dishes are available at Sarafa Bazaar. We savored Poha Jalebi, Sabudana Khichdi, Bhutte ki Kees, Garadu, Malpua, Khopra Patties, Dal Bafla, Dahi Vada, Rabdi, Gulab Jamun, Jaleba, Shrikhand, 10 flavours of pani puri, Kaanji Vada, Indori shikanji, and much more. 

Sarafa Bazaar is a place that beckons food lovers to return, again and again, as much for the taste of its unique offerings as for the spirit of Indore’s storied culinary culture. A must-visit for ardent street food lovers!

After binging on so many dishes we had to walk halfway to our hotel right in the middle of the night before wiffey insisted to hop on the next available drive to the hotel. Our stomachs were on the verge of bursting but the experience we had was worth every ounce. With this, our 2nd day at Indore finally came to an end.

Day 3 began on a comparatively relaxed mode as this was our last day in this city. We had breakfast at the hotel and subsequently checked out.

 Wait!! But this trip is still not over. Leaving our luggage at the hotel we hopped onto our waiting taxi and moved out to the last destination on our list - Khajrana Ganesh Temple. 

It is believed that all wishes are fulfilled by praying in this temple. Highly revered by the local population, this beautiful Ganesh temple was built by the benevolent queen Ahilyabai Holkar. The citizens of Indore have great faith in this Ganesh temple. With a towering Ganesha statue and smaller temples dedicated to other deities, the beautiful and well-maintained temple complex exudes an aura of serenity and spirituality. This undoubtedly is one of the best places in Indore for stealing some tranquil moments and seeking the blessings of the almighty. 

Fortunately for us, the best was kept for the last and must say, we were not at all disappointed. The temple is the real signature of what the city is... as clean as a whistle.

  

For those interested, a big cloth market industry has flourished in Indore. The city is also known for its leather toys, Maheshwari and Chanderi are some very interesting ornate sarees and brocades to offer. There is a lot of zari work coming out of Madhya Pradesh, and the Maheshwari sarees have particularly gained in popularity of late. Besides the fabrics, there is a variety of local carving crafts to choose from. 

After the mandatory shopping for the kids, we moved back to the hotel to pick up our luggage before bidding goodbye to this incredible city with a promise to come back again. It was a memorable visit and loved by each member of our family.

Hope you liked this travel blog. If yes...please leave your valuable comment below and share it with your near and dear ones as well. Bye for now until the time I come up with my next blog.

Happy Reading!!

  

My trip to VARANASI after 27 years…

 It had been a long-pending wish of mine to re-visit a city that shaped me from a shy and unassuming 10-year-old kid to a confident and outgoing 18 year-old young man. So as the Covid situation improved, and train travel normalised; we (me with my family) planned for a weekend trip to Benaras.

Once I got the rail tickets (all waitlisted) done for the 18^th to 21^st Nov trip, my friends pointed out that 19^th Nov–would be ‘Kartik Purnima’- a festival during which the devotees take a holy bath in the Ganges and I should expect a huge crowd in the holy city of Kashi. It is believed that on this auspicious day, Lord Shiva descends on Earth and becomes one with the entire Universe.

For once there were multiple doubts in my mind about whether to cancel or postpone my trip but on second thought I made up my mind to go ahead with my plans, after all, this was our first trip in 2 years, all thanks to Covid Pandemic, which wreaked havoc all around the world.

By the time we boarded the train (04006- Lichchivi Express) from Anand Vihar (Delhi) railway station at 6 pm, two of our four tickets got converted to RAC. We braced ourselves to spend the night sitting. Despite this little discomfort, the excitement of traveling after two long years was way higher. As the train left Kanpur station at midnight, for our good luck the TTE finally managed to get us one more birth which made our onward journey a bit more comfortable.

The train reached Varanasi the next morning dot at 6 am. Stepping out on the platform from the train gave me a peculiar feeling of déjà vu. It was a sense of both familiarity and newness at the same time. I couldn’t hold myself back from taking a selfie once I was out of the station premises

 DAY 1

19^TH NOV 2021

As we started for our hotel from the railway station we saw a huge crowd on both sides of the road moving towards the direction of the ghats. Once we reached our hotel and freshened up, we decided to skip visiting the ghats on day 1 due to the heavy rush. Instead, we planned to visit the other side of the city.

By the time we came out of our hotel, we were hungry, so we decided to pit stop at a shop which was witness to many of my breakfast breaks during my childhood period post our morning cricketing practice at Banaras Hindu University (B.H.U.) grounds.

‘Pehalwaan Lassi’ shop is a small outlet at Malviya Chauraha on Lanka road which could be easily bypassed if you don’t know about it beforehand. I remember this shop was a tiny 8 by 8 outlet during my childhood and it looked just the same even after close to three decades albeit two more branches have come up in the city since then.

 

  The shop owned by a family of a wrestler from the pre-independence period offers a mouth watering lassi in kulahds which the locals and tourists swear by. The tiny shop is always crowded and hardly has a place to sit in.

Apart from lip-smacking lassi they also offer Doodh, Malaiyo, Malayi, Rabri, Samosa, Kachori Sabzi and Jalebi. Your order will be swiftly presented and you have to stand and eat if you wish to savior the delectable dishes.

Having filled our empty stomachs with such delightful variety, we moved a couple of km ahead towards the ‘Vishwanath Temple’ built inside the B.H.U. premises which is dedicated to Lord Shiva. It has the tallest temple tower in the world even higher than the Kutub Minar, with a height of around 250 feet.

                                                

                                  

Shri Vishwanath Temple's construction took 35 years to complete and was completed in the year 1966. The temple is one of the tallest in India. The total height of the temple is approximately 77 meters. Temple's design was inspired by the original Kashi Vishwanath Temple and is made mostly of marble.

Although it’s a Lord Shiva temple, it also consists of nine temples within. The Lord Shiva temple is on the ground floor and the Lakshmi Narayan and Durgaji’s temples are on the first floor. Other temples within Shri Vishwanath Temple are Natraj, Mata Parvati, Lord Ganesha, Panchmukhi Mahadev, Hanumanji, Saraswatiji, and Nandiji. The entire text of  Bhagvad Gita and extracts from sacred Hindu scriptures are inscribed with illustrations on the inner marble walls of the temple which looks mesmerizing. The temple is surrounded by lush green lawns and is a sight to behold.

As we exited the B.H.U. campus a strong urge took me towards a road to the right leading to my alma mater - SUNBEAM SCHOOL, Bhagwanpur which was less than 2 km from there.

The School, a far bigger campus than what it was 3 decades ago is a changed structure now but the feeling it brought within me standing in the premises could not be described in words and it surely brought back school time memories.

From there we moved about 2 kms towards ‘Sankat Mochan Hanuman Mandir’. The temple was established by famous Hindu preacher and poet saint Sri Goswami Tulsidas in the early 16th century. This temple has the unique distinction of having Hanumanji facing his Lord, Rama, whom he worshipped with steadfast and selfless devotion.

In the temple, Prasad is sold like a special sweet (Laddoos and Pedas). We bought the Pedas and believe me they tasted exactly the same even after 3 decades. The temple is attended by thousands of Rama and Hanuman devotees who chant Hanuman Chalisa and Sundarkand and the atmosphere is just out of this world.

Next to Hanuman Mandir (about 1.2 km) is ‘Tulsi Manas Mandir’. This temple has a great historical and cultural importance since the ancient Hindu epic Ramcharitmanas was originally written at this place by Hindu poet-saint, reformer and philosopher Goswami Tulsidas in the 16th century.  

The temple is constructed in white marble and beautiful landscaping is done all around the temple. Verses and scenes from Ramcharitmanas are engraved on the marble walls all over the temple.

Right next to it (550mts) is ‘Shri Durga Mandir’. This temple has great religious importance as it is dedicated to the Maa Durga. It was constructed in the 18^th century by a Bengali Maharani- Rani Bhabani of  Natore.

Next to the temple, is a kund (pond) which was earlier connected to the river Ganges. It is believed that the existing icon of the goddess was not made by a man but appeared on its own in the temple. The temple is painted red to match the colours of the central icon of Durga, the goddess of strength and power. 

Next on the cards was a visit to my primary school-SUNBEAM SCHOOL JUNIOR WING which was right adjacent to Durga Mandir. This was where my formative days were spent.

The small open area right behind the green main gate was our assembly area and the corner window on the first floor right above the painted banner opened into my classroom. This is where I made friends for life. It all felt so nostalgic. I wanted to go inside and re-live those precious memories but since it was a holiday and a festival, even the guard at the gate seemed to be enjoying somewhere inside the premises.

Next up was my erstwhile residence which was a mere 500 mts from my school. I visited my house where I spent good 7 years, met the current tenant- an old lady, said a quick hello to her, and politely requested her to allow me and my younger son a quick tour of the house ( I deliberately took him along with me. After all a man with a young boy accompanying is not that threatening). To my good luck, she agreed and we had a nice tour of my childhood house.

As we were coming out of the house after thanking the old lady for her generosity of letting me (a stranger) inside her house, the barrier was broken. She smilingly bid us goodbye with a request to come back again. It was as if she knew me for ages. This is the beauty of a small town; the people are so welcoming, simple, and warm.           

Then after having lunch, the family decided to move back to the hotel as we were dead tired by now.

 After resting for a few hours our batteries were recharged and we went out again. This time our plan was to visit the ever famous ‘KASHI CHAT BHANDAR’. Their famous ‘Tamatar chat’ was right up there on our priority list which was high on recommendation from one and all.

Guys! Let me take this liberty here and now, if you plan to visit Varanasi and you miss having this special dish then your visit to this holy place is incomplete. I swear this was the BEST ‘Tamatar Chat’ I have ever savored in my life. Its slightly burnt flavor is absolutely wonderful. A visit to Kashi Chat Bhandar is a MUST if you are in Benaras…Period!!

 Now, this outlet is right on Girja Ghar Chauraha in Godowlia just 600 mts from the Ghat. This place always witnesses a lot of rush which invariably spills right onto the road. You need to be quick and vigilant to get a seating space inside the shop as the seats fill as fast as they get emptied.

Before I forget, let me tell you their large size piping hot Gulab jamun which quickly melts in your mouth, Crispy Palak Patta Chaat and delicious Chuda Matar are a must-try too as they come close second to the Tamatar Chat. Prices are reasonable and service quick despite the rush.   

After filling our stomachs with such delicacies we were left with only one option, which was to head back to our hotel and call it a day.                

DAY 2

20^TH NOV 2021

The 2^nd day began with a scrumptious breakfast at a non-described small cafe in a by lane just next to the subzi mandi which leads to the ghat, called ‘NIYATI CAFE’ run by a sophisticated Sharma couple.

The owner Ravi Sharmaji was courteous, friendly, and very welcoming. We reached a bit early while he was just opening and setting up the cafe but he welcomed us with a warm smile and was quick to deliver our order. The food was reasonably priced, homely, and tasty; the space was tiny with only 5 tables but was clean and cozy.

I liked it and recommend it to one and all visiting Varanasi. At times Google takes you to a hidden gem like this which leaves you with a wonderful experience for a long time.

So after filling our stomachs we were all set to visit the most important attraction for the day, which was – The Dasashwamedh Ghat. This Ghat is located close to Vishwanath Temple and is probably the most spectacular ghat of all.  As we walked towards it, the first glimpse of the vast river Ganges (Ganga Maiya for us) took us in and we stood there with folded hands on top of the stairs leading right to the bank of the river Ganges for a few minutes admiring the beauty and vastness of the holy Ganges.

 

                                           

The whole atmosphere was magical. The sun was shining bright, a soft breeze was flowing across, and devotees were busy taking a holy dip and doing their prayers while several colorful boats sitting idle on the river bank waiting to take the tourists and devotees for an unforgettable ride.           

We decided to head for a boat ride first and hired a motorboat that took us on a wonderful ride across the ghats. The boatman doubled as a tourist guide as well gave us running commentary about all the ghats as we approached them one after the other (video link below).

https://photos.app.goo.gl/7mReBo9xnrCMEqpM6 

Benaras has close to a hundred ghats. Most of these are bathing and puja ceremony ghats, while two ghats, Manikarnika and Harishchandra, are used exclusively as cremation sites.

We also crossed the river and alighted on the opposite bank where we were greeted with far less crowd and a sandy beach-like feeling with horse and camel rides to amuse us. I took the camel ride and relived my childhood days. There were small shacks selling chips, biscuits, and titbits too (video link below).

 

https://photos.app.goo.gl/UyfLe5DTuLfjsjux8

 

The kids had a wonderful time playing in the sand and refused to get on the boat to go back for a long time.  

The return journey back to the Ghats was equally unforgettable as several pelican birds flocked onto our boat and literally ate from our hands. It was an awe-inspiring experience!!  

 

As we alighted on the Manmandir Ghat after the boat ride we were greeted by a majestic Palace in front of us which drew us towards it.

The locals told us that this was Raja Savai Jai Singh’s Palace who made a Jantar Mantar Observatory in the 17^th century on the roof of the palace. Savai Jai Singh, the king of Amber estate in Rajasthan was a genius of a most unusual kind, an expert mathematician and astronomer as well as an enlightened ruler and builder.

We visited the Palace and quickly made our way to the roof. The Observatory is a replica of what is there in Jaipur, Delhi, Ujjain, and Mathura (all made by the same King). The accuracy of time, altitudes, planets and even eclipses even after so many years always astonishes me at these places. What master craftsmen these people were! What would have been their level of understanding and knowledge of celestial planets, and astronomy that they were able to create such masterpieces? Grand salute to them!! 

 The roof also gives a splendid view of the Holy River Ganges with colorful boats on its shores.

As we descended from the roof we saw various Tableau depicting the city’s culture and attractions on the ground floor. 

 The most heart-touching and mesmerizing was the sound and light show depicting a 15 mins film on the “Descent of the Ganga”. Believe me, it was a treat to watch and a must experience when you visit Benaras next time (Sharing the link of the film video made by me. Use headphones for better sound quality).

https://photos.app.goo.gl/2gPJR6mqymZZYcBc9

Our next stoppage was at just 400 mts away and was the ultimate one. Finally, the time had come to pay our respect to Baba Vishwanath and witness the new and more spacious Shri Kashi Vishwanath Temple premise which was the talk of the town.

For those who don’t know, The Kashi Vishwanath Temple is one of the 12 jyotirlingas in India and draws lakhs of visitors from India and abroad every year. 

Unfortunately, no phones or cameras were allowed inside but you have to witness the new premise by your own eyes to believe it.

I had been to the temple some 3 decades back and lanes leading to it were so congested that one cannot pass through them without pushing other devotees, overhead electric wires used to make a dense net and the corners were splashed with filth and dirt but here the approach of the temple was a vast open space with grand gateways and ornamental arches in heritage architecture style in four directions.

The work for the corridor was still on at full swing. Once the project is completed, the devotees could take a dip in the holy Ganges at the Lalita Ghat and can come straight to Baba Vishwanath for Darshan which was impossible earlier as they had to pass through congested streets to reach the temple from the ghats. 

As you enter through the carved doors, you are greeted with stone-made sculptures of Bharat Mata, statues of Saint Adi Shankaracharya and Maharani Ahilyabai Holkar. Maharani Ahilyabai is believed to have constructed the temple in the 17th century. In the 19th century, Maharaja Ranjit Singh had got the temple crowned with a golden 'Shikhar'. In the middle of the open premise, the actual temple structure stands tall with its trademark golden canopies high and tall.

We felt a lot of peace as we bowed our heads in front of Baba Vishwanath. This was the moment we were looking forward to and completely soaked ourselves in the atmosphere in and around the holy temple. You can’t come out of the temple premise without chanting “Bam Bam Bhole” and “Har Har Mahadev”. 

As we came out it was time for the evening tea so we headed towards the much recommended- Laxmi Chaiwala which was a mere 500 mts from there.  Now you will ask what is so special about this chaiwala, so let me tell you this small outlet in a dingy by lane serves tea with ‘Makkhan toast’. Yes, you read it correctly- toast with white makkhan not with yellow Amul butter and that is the USP of this utterly and insanely famous Tea shop. The toast is heated directly on coal sigadi with fresh white butter. Do visit once for the experience of having tea with white makkhan toast. 

 

 After filling our stomachs with makkhan toast and tea with headed back for the Dashashwamedh Ghat. Why ?? For the splendid Ganga Aarti off course.

Now if you are visiting Benaras, witnessing this Evening Aarti is a must on your ‘to do’ list. You have to be there and witness it to believe the atmosphere created there every single day. A group of priests performs ‘Agni Pooja’ wherein a dedication is made to Lord Shiva, River Ganges, Surya (Sun), Agni (Fire), and the whole universe.

The whole atmosphere despite the heavy crowd was absolutely magical. You just don’t want to leave the place in a hurry but stay there just a bit more to absorb the resplendent mood of the surrounding with echoes of holy chants and bright lights of the Aarti ( Do watch the Ganga Aarti video in the link below).

https://photos.app.goo.gl/MUmJ6uf8852jgnFu5

After being intrigued thoroughly, it was time to head back to our hotel room for a peaceful sleep as day 2 of our Benaras trip came to an end.

DAY 3

21^st  NOV 2021

Today was the last day of our trip and we wanted to make the most of it so we checked out of our hotel quickly and took off for Sarnath which was a good 10 km from the city of Benaras. Now Sarnath for those who don’t know is famous as the site where Gautama Buddha first taught the Dharma, or where Buddha preached his first sermon. Sarnath has been developed as a place of pilgrimage for Buddhists from India and abroad. 

As we got down at Sarnath it was still early from the tourist standards so we decided to have breakfast and let the sleepy village open up. We entered this quirky-looking restaurant.

The walls of the restaurant were plastered with posters that had peculiar lines on them. It looked as if the owner had picked them up to lend an eccentric look to the place. 

 

Despite the quirkiness, the food served was warm, homely and economical. Do visit this joint whenever you are there in Sarnath next.

The restaurant’s back door opens into a small Zoo which houses emu, crocodile, porcupine, cranes, deer, and various birds but there is nothing to write home about as this is the worst-kept zoo I have ever seen. It was so saddening to see the pathetic state of the animals in those dirty cramped enclosures. I hope the authorities take measures to improve the situation.

Just next to the zoo is The Mahabodhi Temple. It is one of the most ancient temples in India. It is where Lord Buddha attained enlightenment. 

After this, we visited the Thai Temple- A well-known attraction in Sarnath. It displays the Thai style of architecture. The temple is set amongst beautiful gardens and is managed by Thai Buddhist Monks offering calm and peaceful surroundings.

Next in line was the impressive Dhamek Stupa which is extremely popular among tourists. It is the place where Buddha gave his first sermon after attaining enlightenment, in which he explained the four noble truths and the teachings associated with them.

Also on the site are ruins of monasteries and buildings established by the Indian Buddhist ruler Ashok. It is also home to the legendary lion capital memorial pillar built by King Ashoka, the current Indian national emblem. Nearby, an Archaeologic Museum houses relics from the site.

From there we moved back to the city to visit the Bharat Mata Mandir. This temple is built on the campus of Mahatma Gandhi Kashi Vidyapith. 

 

Instead of traditional statues of Gods and Goddesses, this temple has a huge map of Undivided India carved in marble brought from Makrana (now in Pakistan) which makes it unique and a must-visit place. It shows Afghanistan, Pakistan including Balochistan, Bangladesh, Myanmar as Burma, and Sri Lanka as Ceylon all part of undivided India. My kids were thrilled to see such a huge map of India.

 The map depicts a detailed layout of 450 mountain ranges and peaks, vast plains, water bodies, rivers, oceans, and plateaux. It also shows the scale and depth of the geographical entities mentioned on it. This temple is one of its kind in the whole world. Bharat Mata Mandir was constructed in 1936 and was inaugurated by Mahatma Gandhi. 

Twentieth-century Hindi poet Maithili Sharan Gupt, fondly called Rashtra Kavi composed a poem on the inauguration of the temple which is also put up on a board in the building.

The water bodies depicted in the map are filled with water and the land areas are decorated with flowers on Republic Day and Independence Day.

One inch of the area in the map covers 6.40 miles on land and from a window installed at the ground level in the basement; the difference among the heights of the various peaks is clearly visible.

Although the surroundings of the temple are not well maintained, the temple visit is recommended due to its uniqueness. 

This brought curtains to our much-awaited trip to Benaras with many childhood memories revisited and lots of new memories made in the course of 3 days.

We boarded our train-12381-Howrah-New Delhi Special from the newly rechristened spotlessly clean Benaras Railway Station (erstwhile Maduadih Railway Station). As our train rolled out of the station, I thought Varanasi had surely changed from what it was 3 decades ago. Looking at this station and the city in totality, this was a much awaited welcome change.  

Hope you enjoyed reading my blog. Don’t forget to share your thoughts in the comment section. Until next time…bye tc.